hello happy cny !! so fast cny ler. i have been lookin forward to this day but in the end turn out to be so... don noe how to describe lar. jus sux lor this year de cny. haiix. nvm start my story from last week. last week was kinda stress. thats why i got some cut in my arms. everytime i cut myself, i jus feel so... don noe how to descirbe lar. but jus very nice lor. ppl around me keep tellin my don cut myself ever again, but do they noe how i feel. NO !! no one noe how im feeling !! i feel so miserable. i feel so guitly after seeing his profile. why cant we jus forget each other ? actually im starting to forget the past. but when i saw ur profile, i start to think of u again, think of the past again. im happy to see u smile. at least i noe that u are leading a perfect life. i'll rather let myself suffer. haiix. forget it. no one understand me. get back to my daily life. last friday went out with cres joy n rebec. at first go buy tickets then go eat n took neoprints. then go and watch i not stupid too. its so nice. very touching and also very funny. laugh till peng lor. but also cry till siao. cos really very sad. and i think of him when i watching. cos he really look quite like him. the side view and his attitude look so alike. even meizhi also say so. then after that went home around 8+. actually wan go out eat dinner de. but no one wan to go with me ): haiix. sian lor then nvr eat dinner on that day. then cny eve. wow eat steam boat. da jie came home with alastir. lovely coupple (: cant wait for them to get married. but for me, i noe i will nvr ever get to find true love again. anyway we started eating at around 5. quite early uh ? no choice. cos da jie have to go chinatown to help out. then ah yi and gege join in at around 8+ and we have the second round ^.^ lolx. at nite went to tm with er jie. she wanted to pass smth to marry jie. then we went mac eat ice cream. then got one guy keep bio-ing er jie. think wan get number from her bah. but er jie say its not her type. then she go diao him. cos she jus simpily hate ah beng. thats why aaron have turn from an ah beng into a "guai kia" ler. hahax. then er jie ask me why i go cut my hand. then i diam diam. she told me not to cut it again. she noe how i feel cos last time she also cut before. she even more worst. cut until go clinic. becos of some stupid guy make hjim feel so sad. the next day was the first day of cny. went to ah ma house with da jie n er jie in the late afternoon. mom n dad went there early while we were still aslp. sian go there kena ps. no one tok to me except gege. then he keep messing my hair. the cousins seems so unfriendly this year. don noe why ? haiix. then after that go da yi house to visit shu fen jie. she was injured. i feel so sad for her. when i see her leg, my heart break. but she still put on her best smile to serve us. she is indeed a nice person. then er jie went out with her frens. ps me again !! haiix. this year why no ppl jio me go out de ?! haiix. really sad lor. boring cny. why didnt he msg me and ask me out ? that time he still say cny wan go out with me. haiix ): then todae is the second day of cny. no ppl jio me out again. haiix. should i stop my cuts or should i go on ? thats the only way to release my stress if i go on. HAIX ! i feel so lost now. im so useless. feel like dying. haiix. gtg end here lia0x. happy cny everyone. tc frenx !!
